【Exploring The Jungle Between My Wife’s Crotch】

Former U.S. president Donald Trumpmade history today,Exploring The Jungle Between My Wife’s Crotch becoming the country's first erstwhile Commander in Chief to be convicted of a felony. Though apparently not one to do things by halves, Trump was in fact convicted of 34 felonies — specifically, 34 counts of falsifying business records. That's over three tens. And that's terrible.

Sentencing is still over a month away, with both jail time and a fine not outside the realm of possibility for Trump. It's also practically an inevitability that he will appeal. Of course, none of this has stopped internet denizens from immediately meting out their own brand of justice, flooding social media in a deluge of jokes.

For a self-proclaimed "world-class businessman,"falsifying 34 business records just doesn't seem like good business sense.

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Many of Trump's critics are celebrating the news of his conviction, gleefully mocking the former president. Still, some are being careful to temper their expectations, acknowledging that it's unlikely Trump's guilty verdict will result in significant consequences, or undo the years of harm and division done to American society.

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Meanwhile, others noted that this guilty verdict put Republicans in the bizarre situation of having a convicted felon as their candidate for President of the United States. There is no law in the United States that disqualifies people from running for president if they have criminal convictions.

Trump's conviction doesn't mean he'll lose voting rights either. Despite many mistakenlystatingotherwise, felons who are convicted in New York can still cast a ballotprovided they aren't actually in jail during the voting period. 

Still, the fact that this is even a question says a lot about the state of U.S. politics right now.

• Trump found guilty on all 34 counts, social media asks: Now what?
• 'The Daily Show' brutally mocks Trump's decision not to testify
• Jon Stewart hits out at the media's obsessive Trump trial coverage
• Stephen Colbert breaks down day 3 of Trump’s trial
• Stephen Colbert defends Jimmy Kimmel after Trump's rambling Truth Social tirade

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Predictably, Trump’s supporters have been quick to claim that the trial was "rigged."Some have further declared their intentionto votefor Trumpduring the 2024 U.S. presidential election, regardless of his new status as a convicted felon.

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We'll just have to wait until the election is held in November to see how all this ultimately shakes out. For now, most are simply reveling in the spectacle.

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(Note: Please do not actually search for "Donald Trump Rule 34," unless you are completely alone and in the mood for seeing things you will never be able to unsee. Or do. They're your eyes.)