Your stomach is The Impotent King (2005) in English Subtitlesan oil slick of Christmas cookies and tequila, and your skull feels like it's filled with pulsing concrete. Happy New Year, baby!
For many, the New Year's Day hangover is as familiar a tradition as the Times Square ball drop — but with less auld lang syne and more watered-down Gatorade. Luckily, streaming services from Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, Max, Prime Video, and Tubi offer tons of phenomenal content to help us fast-forward through our mornings/afternoons/day-and-a-halfs of misery.
SEE ALSO: 25 best movies of 2023, and where to watch themBroken down by specific post-party situations, here are 19 movies streaming right now to help you overcome your hangover woes. Godspeed, you warrior.
When it comes to nailing the queasy cinematic experience, your film of choice must be engaging enough to distract you from wanting to hurl, but not so special-effects heavy that your couch turns into Space Mountain. Here are a few picks that fit the bill:
Think modern-day politics meets Mean Girls meets Nebraska and you've got Alexander Payne's timeless face-off between social studies teacher Jim McAllister (Matthew Broderick) and student government icon Tracy Flick (Reese Witherspoon)
How to watch: Election is now streaming on Max.
The David O. Russell dramatic comedy that earned Jennifer Lawrence her Oscar pairs her with Bradley Cooper as a pair of hot messes who find love and a second lease on life through a dance competition.
How to watch: Silver Linings Playbook is now streaming on Netflix.
Craig Gillespie's biographical comedy stars Margot Robbie as the controversial Olympic figure skater Tonya Harding. Warning: There's a really rough knee injury and also an unbearably cute bird.
How to watch: I. Tonya is now streaming on Max.
Another biopic, this drama chronicles the life of theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking with Eddie Redmayne in the lead. He shines so bright throughout, you'll hardly remember how much you want to throw up.
How to watch: The Theory of Everything is available for rental or purchase on Prime Video.
First, drink some water. Second, select a film that is the equivalent of your mother gently stroking your hair while you snuggle a kitten upon a velvety cloud of butterfly kisses. Perhaps one of the following feel-good flicks will suffice:
If there's one movie that can quietly lull anyone to sleep, it's Big. A kid ages up overnight into Tom Hanks and spends his time doing stuff like playing a giant piano.
How to watch: Big is now streaming on Disney+.
Nick Offerman stars as a doting dad who plays guitar and owns a vinyl shop. Need I say more? Complete with a soundtrack that totally slaps, this heartfelt love letter to dads and daughters is an utter delight.
How to watch: Hearts Beat Loud is now streaming on Peacock.
You'll need to watch the volume on this one, but no amount of Tylenol can compare to the healing effects of ABBA. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll probably call your dad.
How to watch: Mamma Mia!is available for rental or purchase on Prime Video.
You're not exactly sure what, but somethingis telling you to be very embarrassed. Lucky for you, Hollywood is chock-full of characters doing things way more humiliating than whatever trash you pulled last night. Try some of these "Well, at least I didn't do that"sagas.
One thing you didn't do last night: become a gigantic monster and subsequently crush the city of Seoul. The complete embodiment of wondering "What did I do when I was drunk?"Colossal is a comedy that's crackling and a bit crushing.
How to watch: Colossal is available for rental or purchase on Prime Video.
Last night you probably didn't spray mace into the face of an unsuspecting bride... but if you did, at least you and Ingrid (Aubrey Plaza) can relate.
How to watch: Ingrid Goes West is available for rental or purchase on Prime Video.
Note to self: Do not write love letters to everyone you have ever had a crush on, seal them in addressed envelopes, and then just leave them around to be accidentally sent. Your awkward midnight kiss could not have been worse (or as cute) as Lara Jean Covey's misadventures in love.
How to watch: To All the Boys I've Loved Before is now streaming on Netflix.
Unless you purchased a number of billboards last night, nothing you did is more embarrassing than the character arc of Peter Klaven in I Love You, Man. Starring Paul Rudd and Jason Segel, this classic aughts comedy is a good hang.
How to watch: I Love You, Man is now streaming on Max.
Maybe scheduling brunch with your significant other's parents for Jan. 1 wasn't such a great idea. Regardless, you have about three hours until you need to be first impression ready. And honestly? You're still a littlevery drunk. Try some coffee and maybe stream one of these intense, gripping dramas to get your blood flowing:
Nothing says, "Wow, I should be paying attention more!" like an alien invasion turned human rights allegory. A little too real, this unsettling found footage project is as good now as when it first awed audiences.
How to watch: District 9 is now streaming on Hulu.
Only a shot of whisky (or a fall off a horse) could wake you up like Quentin Tarantino's critically acclaimed Western. Starring Samuel L. Jackson, Kurt Russell, Jennifer Jason Leigh, and a slew of other familiar faces, this wild ride is sure to jolt you back to your senses.
How to watch: The Hateful Eight is now streaming on Netflix.
Based on Cormac McCarthy's novel of the same name, this terrifying crime thriller from the Coen Bros. stars Javier Bardem and a surprising application of compressed air. You have been warned: It gets rough.
How to watch: No Country for Old Men is now streaming on Showtime.
Sometimes the only solution to too much partying is more partying. But don't go it alone. Instead, let one of these wild, cinematic nights accompany your wild, groggy morning. Happy New Years, ya filthy animal.
Groundhog Day, but with romance and booze! This Adam DeVine comedy relives the same party on repeat just like you're doing with that leftover wine right now.
How to watch: When We First Met is now streaming on Netflix.
Not unlike Channing Tatum's rock-hard abs, Magic Mike just does not get old. If it's before noon and you're cracking open a beer, no reason you can't enjoy some saucy stripping, too — and from the comfort of your couch, no less!
How to watch: Magic Mike is now streaming on Hulu.
Featuring Jason Schwartzman in his most ridiculous role since Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, The Overnightis a super weird drug and alcohol-infused playdate that turns harmless fun into an unsettling fever dream.
How to watch: The Overnight is now streaming on Tubi.
When searching for a hangover coach, look no further than The Dude. An ode to enlightenment, chillness, and interior furnishing, this Coen brothers cult classic is what morning afters are made of.
How to watch: The Big Lebowski is now streaming on Netflix.
UPDATE: Dec. 15, 2023, 12:43 p.m. EST This post has been updated to reflect current streaming access.
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